as an athiest...and the loss of friendships with theists

Over the past few years I have noticed a strong decline in the number of theist friends I have. I am a pretty go judge of character and with that being said, I am surprised at the character of some of the people who are on the other side of the fence. I can understand why I am not friends with people of different political views; conservatives really don't get really like me because I am too liberal and apparently "just don't understand." but given that I have lost contact with many religious people after I got the nerve to stand up for my own beliefs.

It seems like once I tell people that I don't believe in g-d, I first get this micro expression of disgust, followed by the expression of confusion (since I am not a bad/evil person, druggie or some kind of Satan worshiper) and lastly they always feel they need to pray for me so that i eventually "see the light and follow the path of the lord." Then the next thing that happens is they offer me the bible and tell me to read it and see if I change my mind. I have been studying various religions for at least 7 years now. Before that I admit I was not well versed in much more than my own ideas, then I learned what is the real worth of my thoughts without learning what others had to say. It was almost like I was blowing off other opinions and theories without ever hearing them...I did change my ways on that.

I started researching starting with the KJV of the Holy Bible, since other than my encyclopedias that was my only form of reference I had regarding religion. I read that in the 10 grade or so. I analyzed it down to the last mystery, to the very sentence and interpreted it myself. I was still quite regarding my faith, sometimes shying away from the discussion leaving it as "to each their own."

Then began studying other religious Buddhism, Hinduism, Paganism and other forms of mythos ranging from Egyptian to Mayan...I even read about the flying spaghetti monster lol. I began to gain confidence in my knowledge, and further synthesizing what I would come to hold as the center of my always evolving theories and beliefs. I started voicing my opinion when asked both publicly and in private discussion.

Slowly, I noticed how my friendship pool became more and more theologically anorexic. I even asked a few of my christian friends flat out, what happened? A simple answer was that I had become too questioning of their beliefs of that I was too argumentative. I make it a point never to say anything unless directly asked or if brought up in general discussion. I do not, "preach" on a corner, hand out fliers, knock on doors or even run up to strangers insulting they beliefs. Yet my former friends were saying that I was too much for them and had lost desire to be my friend. A simple point I would like to make here is, how come my christian friends couldn't be more Christ-like instead of the, now realized, typical exclusionary Christian. Christ accepted those who were different, he sat and talked to those who wanted to speak with him and my have had questions or differing opinions, he was a man that by historical context was accepting and noble. I even had a discussion with a man preaching at a school once. When I asked questions that he couldn't answer he said I was just trying to argue, when I said something doesn't make sense (like how Lot gave his two daughters to be raped which just seemed wrong I mean the angels were freaking angels they had the almighty helping and protecting and if G-d can protect Cain long enough to build a city then he can protect his angels from a mob). The man just got mad with me.

I just find it so discouraging that most theists have a hard time accepting someone that doesn't believe like they do. Like I am some kind of a Leper and if they get too close they will be infected with my atheism. Be accepting. patient and understanding. Most of all, listen to other opinions..I certainly have, and before you judge me as a sinner and condemn me to your variation of hell I would ask you to listen to mine and the thousands of others who aren't saying exactly what you are...whether I agree with all of them too, is another story but I will always listen and try to understand but will always be questioning...as should you.